Are You a Toxic Leader?
Four signs you are swimming in harmful and toxic leadership water.
A river runs through the town where I live.
It’s called the Reedy.
Back in the day, when Greenville, SC was a working mill town and before the EPA existed, the Reedy River was the dumping ground for some serious toxic waste. It’s been cleaned up over the years. Downtown Greenville is beautiful now.
But there are still signs warning not to swim here.
Invisible bacteria and toxins are abundant in these waters.
People swim here anyway.
They don’t read the signs.
They are ignorant of an incredibly unhealthy invisible environment.
An environment that can make swimmers really sick.
This happens in organizations, as well.
Leaders addicted to the power create a toxic ecosystem. The people swimming in their sphere have no idea.
My biggest leadership concern is the number of leaders who don’t understand the dynamics of their own power.
We see these headlines weekly.
They are disturbing.
Another leader, exposed for abuse of power.
We don’t need more toxic leaders.
Toxic leadership results from an relationship with power, and every person who leads should guard their soul against this.
Many of my clients work in difficult situations with broken people and dysfunctional systems. Power abuse produces so many of these situations.
I work with a large number of folks working in Southeast Asia, all of whom are serving people marginalized because of the abuse of power.
The people of Cambodia are still suffering the repercussions of genocide from just a generation ago.
In Thailand, the powerful are trafficking the poorest.
We know people in the Philippines serving a marginalized minority group who were run off their historic homeland to scratch a living out of a mountainside.
Today, in Myanmar, the powerful have guns and are killing or imprisoning anyone who resists them.
This list could go for pages.
So much human suffering is a direct result of powerful people. Rather than using power for the betterment and uplifting of those who are without power, powerful people use power to secure their position of power, gain more money, or satiate their lust. The nature of power is to cling to it at all costs, and at the expense of anyone standing in the way.
How do you stay wary of power and the corruption that goes with it?
Step one: Recognize the Extent of Your Power
I used to be the pastor of a small church of around 100 people. It wouldn’t seem like a position of great power. There are many bigger churches with more influence and affluence.
This doesn’t matter. A little unchecked power goes a long way.
I remember the day it occurred to me I had the ear of nearly one hundred people for 45-minutes every single week. Those people knew me, liked me, and trusted me. The possibility of exercising toxic power was sobering. If you lead anything, however small, you have power. Thus, you have the potential for its abuse.
Uncle Ben of Spiderman fame was correct when he said, “With great power comes great responsibility.”
I say with any power comes great responsibility.
All leadership comes with great power.
Recognize this.
Failure to recognize our power is step one on a path to abusing it.
Step two: Look for the Warning Signs of Toxicity
Accountability isn’t enough. Too many people think they are accountable and aren’t. It’s too easy to lie to yourself and to others. Leaders are good at accountability avoidance.
When driving down an unfamiliar road, it’s important to watch for warning signs. I’m always on the lookout for these four “power alerts” in my life.
I coach people to keep watch for these, as well.
If you find yourself in a place of leadership, look out for these warning signs that your power is getting out of check.
1. The needs of those you serve are on the back burner
One of my early mentors looked me in the eye and said, “People always come before work. Because people are your work.” I’ve never forgotten this.
This is leadership lesson 101. People are always more important. More important than reputation or winning an argument or even the status of your organization. If reputation (yours or your organization) takes precedent over the needs of the people you serve, there is a potential power problem. Caution.
Unchecked power protects itself, its reputation, and its position first.
Influential leaders serve the good of people first.
2. You don’t keep your own rules
I once worked for someone who routinely and light-heartedly said, “Do as I say, and not as I do”. Sure, it was in quasi-jest. But I lost an element of respect for the leader and assumed all the policies of the organization were optional.
So did everyone else who worked for him.
Any leader who acts as if rules and policies don’t apply to them is in a dangerous place. Leaders are not above rules and a system of accountability. Don’t convince yourself otherwise. Hypocrisy is a warning sign of flaunting power.
3. Lack of discipline in mind, body, and soul
Even the Bible connects discipline of the body and discipline of the soul (I Corinthians 9:24-27). There’s not space here to talk about the importance of discipline and leadership here. (I’m currently reading Ryan Holiday’s new book, so there may be more to come in this area), but here’s what I know:
Consistent disruptions in my habits and rhythms are warning sirens that something is wrong. When my morning routine is regularly askew and my desk is in complete disarray, I know it’s time to check in with myself.
Discover the habits you need to be healthy: reading Scripture, prayer, healthy eating, making the bed, sleep patterns – whatever the rhythm is for you.
Notice when you’re out of rhythm and your regular disciplines wane. This is a sign something isn’t right, and you may be entering toxicity.
4. Lack of empathy
When a leader can no longer walk in the shoes of the people they serve, it’s a dire warning. Leaders who lack empathy are no longer in touch. Compassion and empathy are leadership behaviors, as much as are decision making and vision. Failure to listen, show interest, and encourage are signals that something deeper is wrong. It’s the beginning of toxic leadership.
To avoid dysfunctional and toxic leadership, recognize your own power and influence. You have more than you think.
Then be aware of the warning signs.
Putting your needs first
Breaking your own rules
Breaking your rhythms
Lack of empathy
We need more leaders.
But we can not substitute the quality of leadership for quantity. Leaders who turn toxic cause more harm than they will ever know.
Effective leaders understand themselves – and understand their power.
Guard your soul from the subtle lure of power and lead with the empathy, sacrifice, and authenticity. Heed the signs. Stop swimming in water that can harm you and everyone around you.
What about you?
Do you have any personal danger signs warning that you’re entering toxic waters? Share them in the comments! We all want to get better at this stuff.