Irritation, Learning, and Outsight
I am not a competitor.
In fact, I am aggressively not a competitor. When in a room of competitors, I let them contend while I play another game. If it comes down to winning and losing, I will let you win. Because I don’t care about winning. Not like that.
And I particularly don’t care about winning when the person next to me cares about winning. Turns out, it’s my own passive-aggressive way of dealing with irritation.
Which makes me an irritant. It goes both ways.
Irritants and frustrations come in many forms. But let’s be honest. The “form” is usually that of a person.
So we either ignore the person or we fight them. Call them out. Tell them they’re annoying. Swear at them under our breath out loud in a room of people.
This is not good outsight.
Imagine the person who is your life’s greatest irritation. The frustrating one who is always angry. Or always happy. The person who constantly complains. Or who never complains but who subversively undermines.
The person who constantly wants to compete with you. Or the person who refuses to compete with you.
What does this person have to teach you?
This is a radically different approach than what I’ve taken in the past. I’ve made the error on both sides: ignore and swear at. Neither of which exudes empathy and learning.
The practice of outsight is the practice of empathy. It’s learning from others.
And empathy is a practice. Just as irritation is a practice. Competition is a practice.
Outsight is a practice.